Angry Man's Total Office Annihilation
0:01
愚蠢的经济让我不得不有一份办公室工作。
Stupid economy making me have an office job with income.
0:05
为什么这把椅子上有这么多恶心的污渍？天哪，这个键盘真花哨又笨重。
Why does this chair got all these gross stains on it? Gosh, this keyboard is fancy and bulky.
0:12
这么符合人体工程学。这个扬声器的嗡嗡声怎么回事？
So ergonomic. What's with this stupid buzzing noise on these speakers?
0:19
办公室里需要安静。这个嗡嗡声更响了。
It needs to be quiet in the office. This buzz is even louder.
0:27
靠背真是太松了！为什么是宽屏？应该是4x3！
The back is so slouchy! Why is it a widescreen? It's supposed to be 4x3!
0:34
快点！
Come on!
0:37
正在启动Windows 95。最好启动Windows 95。
Starting Windows 95. Better start Windows 95.
0:48
哦，这里有个键盘。怎么回事？它不工作。剩余时间？
Oh, here's a keyboard. What the heck? It's not working. Time remaining?
0:55
你说剩余时间是什么意思？我为什么不能直接按回车就行？安全模式？
What do you mean, time remaining? Why can't I just press enter and go? Safe mode?
1:00
安全模式有什么安全的？快点！等待时间。
What's so safe about safe mode? Hurry up! Time waiting.
1:06
输入一个选择。一个！正常！快启动Windows 95！
Enter a choice. One! Normal! Just start Windows 95!
1:13
天哪，真是等了够久！
Gosh, took long enough!
1:18
为什么是超清4K？为什么看起来全是像素化的？
Why is it ultra crisp 4K? Why is it all pixelated looking?
1:25
正在测试扩展内存。这内存到底扩展了多少？
Testing extended memory. How extended is this memory?
1:33
计算器是什么？LC伙伴？我为什么需要计算器？我有电脑来计算。
What is the calculator? LC mate? Why would I need the calculator? I've got the computer to do the calculating.
1:43
这愚蠢的东西在我碰到它时就坏了。怎么回事？多便宜啊？
Stupid thing just broke when I touched it. What the heck? How cheap?
1:50
快点，测试内存。快点。你测试内存完了吗？它说完成了。
Come on, test the memory. Hurry up. Are you done testing the memory? It says done.
1:59
我们装备了那个愚蠢的嗡嗡声！为什么显示器会那样裂开？
We equipped that stupid buzzing! Why'd the monitor crack like that?
2:06
扬声器怎么就欺骗了，什么都没有？
What's the speakers just cheating and having a big block of nothing?
2:14
愚蠢的显示器！松弛！它根本不调节！
Stupid monitor! Slouchy! It just doesn't adjust!
2:22
发生了什么？我为什么看不到屏幕？为什么变得全黑？我得在它消失之前按确定。
What happened? Why can't I see the screen? Why is it going all dark? I gotta press OK before it disappears.
2:31
哦，我不行！这个愚蠢的鼠标没用！
Oh, I can't! This stupid mouse is useless!
2:38
为什么整个显示器都在变黑？我无法完成我的办公室工作，显示器在玩游戏！
Why is the whole monitor just fading to black? I can't get my office right done with the monitors playing games!
2:45
应该在播放Office！这个愚蠢的嗡嗡声！安静！
It's supposed to be playing Office! This stupid buzzing! Be quiet!
2:50
停止嗡嗡声！你需要和计算器兼容吗？
Stop buzzing! You need to be compatible with the calculator?
3:02
太阳能板出来了。仍然可以使用。
Solar panel came out. Still works.
3:07
这是一个超级现代的东西！什么都不显示！
This is a super modern to do something! It's not showing anything!
3:14
现在全是色彩斑斓的！那就是艺术展示！
It's all colourful now! That'd be the art display!
3:23
愚蠢的人体工学办公室！人体工学键盘太笨重了！没法用！
Stupid ergonomic office! Ergonomic keyboards are too bulky! Can't use it!
3:30
在这个愚蠢的椅子上动不了！太笨重了！
Can't move anywhere in here in this stupid chair! It's so bulky!
3:35
有一根骨头掉下来了，快上去！给我！
There's a bone falling down, get up there! Give it to me!
3:45
我要坐在这里完成我的办公室工作！那两个吵闹的扬声器！
I'm gonna sit here and get my office work done! Those two noisy speakers!
3:55
天哪，这些键盘实在太笨重了！坚不可摧！
Gosh, these keyboards are just too bulky! Indestructible!
4:07
微软键盘应该与微软Windows兼容！Windows！
Microsoft keyboard should be compatible with Microsoft Windows! Windows!
4:13
啊，现在至少底部显示了一些东西。快点做点什么！
Ah, now it's showing something on the bottom at least. Do something!
4:19
愚蠢的鼠标！点击不对！更好地点击！丢了你的花哨球！
Stupid mouse! Not clicking right! Click better! Lost your fancy ball!
4:28
这些边框怎么都掉下来了？太容易拿下来了！
What's with all these bezels just coming off like that? Too easy to take them off!
4:35
哦，装有Shikini的间谍摄像头！那是超间谍公司吗？
Oh, it's got the Spy Camera by Shikini! Is that the Ultra Spy Company?
4:42
想在办公室里监视我？好像老板已经在这样做了？
Trying to spy on me in the office? As if the boss man doesn't do that already?
4:49
看来我只能用老式的方法来计算。显示得不对！天哪！
Guess I'm just gonna have to do the old fashioned way and calculate with this. It's not showing it right! Gosh!
4:59
愚蠢的计算器！应该是花哨的！计算器没问题！
Stupid calculator! Supposed to be fancy! Calculator right!
5:05
比电脑更先进！今天我们不再驼背，愚蠢的人体工学。
More advanced than the computer! We quit slouching today, stupid ergonomic.
5:18
一个丛林监视器一直在驼背。想玩方向盘，方向块。
A jungle monitor just keeps slouching. Wants to play steering wheel, steering block.
5:32
嗯，也许我只需要打破玻璃，把一些配件拿出来。我们这里有什么？哦，那真方便。
Huh, maybe I just need to break the glass and get some of those accessories out. What have we got here? Oh, that's convenient.
5:39
拆迁手套？这应该能帮我完成办公室工作。嗯。
Demolition gloves? That should help me get the office work done. Huh.
5:46
试试这个。给我那额外的内存。
Give that a go. Give me that extra memory.
5:55
我现在要测试那额外的标准内存。这里是你的扩展内存。拿去吧。
I'm gonna test that extra standard memory now. Here's your extended memory. Take it.
6:02
拿你的内存芯片。那个明显是便宜的，内存芯片爆炸了。
Take your memory chips. memory chips exploded on that one clearly the cheap one
6:14
拿你的disgetty，那里还有另一个，快去藏起来，我找不到它。
take your disgetty there's that other one go on hide it i can't find it
6:26
它完全消失了，我需要两个！别再嗡嗡作响了！
it's completely gone i need both of them Stop buzzing like that!
6:37
你在办公室里飞来飞去！哦，天哪，声音会更大！
You keep flying in the office! Oh, shit, it'd be extra loud!
6:45
不容易！试着逃跑，老鼠，去藏在老鼠洞里！
No easy! Trying to run away, mouse, go hiding in a mouse hole!
6:54
进电脑里！哦，它想藏在桌子下面！
Get in the computer! Oh, it wants to hide under the desk!
7:03
为什么电脑关机了？它会永远开着。这里还有另一个。
Why did the computer shut down? It's gonna stay on forever. Here's the other one.
7:13
这是什么鬼？这只是块塑料。它甚至不是一个磁盘驱动器。它只是一块假塑料。
What the heck? It's just a piece of plastic. It's not even a disk drive. It's just a fake piece of plastic.
7:21
愚蠢的作弊电脑，带有防倾倒的腿。
Stupid cheating computer with the anti-tipping legs.
7:26
我怎么能把我的双盘设置用作那些假的？进去吧。要接受它。
How am I supposed to use my dual disk setup as one of those fake? Get in there. Gonna accept it.
7:34
修好它，工具。哦，电话想通过缠绕来帮助电脑。
Fix it, tool. Oh, the phone wants to try and help the computer by tangling up.
7:42
来吧，Windows支持。帮帮我。在办公室里帮帮我。
Come on, Windows support. Help me. Help me in the office.
7:58
中国制造。警告！哦，我知道这很危险！
Made in China. WARNING! Oh, I know it's dangerous!
8:04
是的，当然它里面有个大金属块！看起来并没有比实际更令人印象深刻！
Yeah, of course it's got the big metal block in it! It doesn't seem like it's more impressive than it actually is!
8:14
愚蠢的假磁盘驱动器！哦，它有一个华丽的扬声器！
Stupid fake disk drive! Oh, it's got a fancy speaker!
8:24
它停止鸣叫了吗？为什么那个面板上有一个写着绿色的按钮。绿色？
It stopped beeping? Why did that faceplate have a button that said green on it. Green?
8:34
绿色是什么意思？米色！停止嗡嗡声！太烦人了！
What's green supposed to mean? Beige! Stop buzzing! It's so annoying!
8:41
闭嘴！那声音更大！
Shut up! That's even louder!
8:51
为什么它不那样嗡嗡？安静！
Why is it not buzzing like that? Quiet!
8:58
安静地工作！文件在嘈杂的环境中不会自己打字！
Work done in peace! Documents don't type themselves in loud environments!
9:07
华丽的屏蔽扬声器！比那些无屏蔽的好得多！
Fancy shielded speaker! It's much better than those unshielded ones!
9:12
人体工学键盘不够符合人体工学！去掉那个大塑料块！
Ergonic keyboard is not ergonomic enough! Remove the big plastic bulk!
9:20
把这个键盘瘦下来！哦，它就是太笨重了！
Slim down this keyboard! Oh, it's just bulky!
9:34
上面有一个大笨重的支架！
A big bulky stand on it!
9:45
好了，启动！我有Windows 95！它应该是先进的！
There, start up! I've got Windows 95! It's supposed to be advanced!
9:53
我以为Windows 95很高级！
I thought Windows 95 was fancy!
10:05
电梯现在在瘦身。这个办公室的头在这里什么也不做。
The lift's slimming down now. This office head's doing nothing here.
10:20
倾斜的显示器。愚蠢的东西。
Slouching monitor. Stupid thing.
10:29
就像是一个塑料块在上面！它就是不想保持正确的方向！
It's like a plastic bulk on it! It just doesn't want to stay in the right orientation!
10:49
这简直完美！该死的支架！
It's simply perfect! Stupid stand!
10:55
那上面还有一层塑料保护膜。这台电脑怎么了？
That's still with a plastic peel wrap on it. What's wrong with this PC?
11:03
哦，只需要拆掉这个米色螺丝。
Oh, there's just one screw to take off this beige bolt.
11:15
修理工具不见了！它躲起来了！
It's a fix-it tool gone! It's gone into hiding!
11:21
我只好用高尔夫球杆当修理工具。哦不，要撞到办公室的灯吗？
I just have to use the golf club as a fix-it tool. Oh no, smacking the lights in the office?
11:31
有点糟糕。这是个障碍！
Kind of bad. It's a balk!
11:46
为什么会这样关机？它应该保持开启并正常工作！
Why'd it shut down like that? It's supposed to stay on and work!
11:54
为什么声音这么大？
Why has it gone so loud?
12:06
该死的块！我不需要被拖到未来！
Stupid bulk! I don't need to get tried to the future!
12:22
重新开机！谁在试图让我关机？安静！
Turn back on! Who is just trying to shut down on me? Quiet!
12:37
我不想登录。回到里面去。完美。
I don't want to log. Get back in there. Perfect.
12:48
另一个修理工具完全不见了。它去哪里躲藏了？
The other fix tool is just completely gone. Where's it going hiding?
12:55
哦，随便吧。电源。
Oh, whatever. Power supply.
13:06
启动！七人小组？
Power up! Seven team?
13:15
七人小组？好吧，七个人的团队做了这一切。
Seven team? Well, the team of seven people made all this.
13:30
有一个块。这看起来特别安全，对吧？
There's a bulk. This looks extra safe, right?
13:37
哦，那根棒子不再连接了。真是愚蠢。
Oh, that stick doesn't connect anymore. Stupid.
13:53
把整台电脑撕成碎片。质量真差。
Rip this whole computer to shreds. Such a quality.
13:59
什么东西会拆开？在找你，错误？这就是它吗？
What thing comes apart? Seeking you, Error? Is that what it is?
14:06
哈，看看他是否躲起来了。走！
Huh, see if he went hiding. Go!
14:25
喇叭不工作！为什么它要开机？
The horn is not working! Why is he turning on?
14:33
看看它是否工作。插上电源，绿色LED亮了，现在没有理由不工作了。
See if he's working. plug it in yeah the green LEDs on it's got no excuse to not work now
14:49
秘密是什么？拼图块在哪里？
What is the secret? There's the puzzle pieces?
15:02
哇，真华丽！LED灯！
Whoa, it's so fancy! LEDs!
15:13
好亮啊！哇。
So bright! Huh.
15:22
还很长。令人惊讶。什么？
Still long. Surprising. What?
15:34
坚不可摧的LED。给我吧。
Indestructible LED. Give them to me.
15:41
路上有沙子。哦，不，关闭箭头！
Sand in the way. Oh, no, shutdown arrow!
15:56
典型的便宜、舒适的HP垃圾！我厌倦了这个办公室！它就在那里！
Typical cheap, cozy HP junk! I'm tired of this office! It's just there!
16:25
这个上面真是愚蠢的脚！根本没有阻止我倾斜！
Stupid feet on this! Didn't stop my tipping at all!
16:36
你不能在这里超越这个！不要让你的泥泞洞穴！
You can't go beyond this here! Don't get your boggy cave!
16:53
天哪，为什么他们要把这些办公室弄得这么难用？
Gosh, why do they have to make these offices so difficult to use?